Domestic Violence Awareness

Look for the signs that your partner may be an abuser before it is too late. Some of the signs are as follows:


Profile of an abuser

Psychologists have studied certain personality characteristics of individuals who batter their partner. These include:

* Blames others for problems/feelings
* Close mindedness
* Cruelty to animals and/or children
* Hypersensitivity
* Isolation of victim
* Jealousy
* Manipulation through guilt
* Minimization of violence
* Objectification of women
* "Playful" use of force during sex
* Quick Involvement
* Rigid sex roles
* Threats of violence
* Tight control of finances
* Unrealistic expectations
* Verbally abusive

If You Are In An Abusive Relationship, Get Help

"The National Domestic Violence Hotline answers more than 16,000 calls per month from victims, survivors, friends and family members, law enforcement personnel, domestic violence advocates and the general public. Hotline advocates provide support and assistance to anyone involved in a domestic violence situation, including those in same-sex relationships, male survivors, those with disabilities and immigrant victims of domestic violence. All calls to the National Domestic Violence Hotline are confidential."

Recognizing The Signs of Domestic Abuse

"It may not be easy to identify abuse, especially at first. While some relationships are clearly abusive from the outset, abuse often starts subtly and gets worse over time. For example, abuse may begin with occasional hurtful comments, jealousy or controlling behavior. As it gets worse, the abuse may become more frequent, severe or violent. As the cycle of abuse worsens, your safety or the safety of your children may be in danger.

You may be a victim of abuse if you're in a relationship with someone who:

* Controls finances, so you have to ask for money
* Looks at you or acts in ways that scare you
* Acts jealous or possessive, or accuses you of being unfaithful
* Tries to control how you spend your time, who you see or talk to, where you go or what you wear
* Wants you to get permission to make everyday decisions
* Gets angry when drinking alcohol or using drugs
* Scares you by driving recklessly
* Threatens to kill him or herself

You are very likely in an abusive relationship if you have a relationship with someone who does even one of the following:

* Hits, kicks, shoves, slaps, or chokes you or threatens you with violence or a weapon
* Forces you to have sexual intercourse or engage in sexual acts against your will
* Calls you names, insults you or puts you down
* Prevents you from going to work or school
* Stops you from seeing family members and friends
* Hurts, or threatens to hurt you, your children or pets
* Destroys your property
* Controls your access to medicines
* Blames you for his or her violent behavior or tells you that you deserve it
* Says that his or her abusive behavior is no big deal or even denies doing it
* Tries to force you to drop charges
* Tries to prevent you from calling the police or seeking medical care"

If you find yourself in an abusive relationship, seek help.

Generational Violence

"The boys in your life need your time and energy. Your son, grandson, nephew, younger brother. The boys you teach, coach and mentor. All need you to help them grow into healthy young men.

Boys are swamped with influences outside of the home – from friends, the neighborhood, television, the internet, music, the movies… everything they see around them. They hear all kinds of messages about what it means to “be a man” – that they have to be tough and in control. There are numerous conflicting and some harmful messages being given to boys about what constitutes “being a man” in a relationship.

Boys need your advice on how to behave toward girls. Boys are watching how you and other men relate to women to figure out their own stance towards girls. So teach boys early, and teach them often, that there is no place for violence in a relationship."

The moral of this is simple: Domestic abuse is generational. When a boy grows up in a home where he sees nothing but violence, he becomes an abuser too.